Tim

Gallon Challenge

2009-02-02T12:41:00.000-08:00

So, yesterday as a pre-Super Bowl activity, Nicole and Tim attempted the gallon challenge. It was absolutely brutal. They both puked a plethora of times. Her milk of choice was 2% while His was chocolate.

We are currently planning attempt #2.

Goldfish

2009-01-28T16:57:00.000-08:00

As we ALL know, Goldfish are the most delicious, delectable, snack ever created. This is a tribute to those ever smiling, little morsels that are impossible to dislike. It is perplexing how such a deliciously cheestastic taste can be packed into such a small aquatic animal. So heres to you Goldfish!

10-140 calories per 55 fish
9-Huge Cheesy Taste
8-Aerodynamically sound-can throw up in the air and catch in mouth
7-Made of real cheese
6-They're delicious
5-They ALWAYS smile back
4-The most optimistic of the snacks
3-Made on a cozy wooden farm with a watermill
2- Nonsegregated-all colors in one box
1- Can be used as a creative outlet

Welcome back!

2009-01-27T14:35:00.000-08:00

This is the glorious return of Tim's blog. Since He does no work at school He thought it was an acceptable way to pass the time in between bingeing. ;-) There will now be a biweekly word emphasized in bold and italics. The meaning however will not be provided. There is really nothing particularly interesting to say besides that except that He is back with season 2 of Tim in the Wild. Season 1 is now available on DVD and VHS for those who can afford it.

Tim owes shoutouts to His beloved loyal followers and new cult members. B-Shave future president of the United States-some say the next James K Polk, T-Blazer, Nicole, Laurie Ann, and since he is feeling magnanimous today Rilez.

2008-03-06T18:04:00.000-08:00

i will write more about this epic creature 2morro

high school

2008-03-03T17:29:00.000-08:00

For this last blog, i am going to use a metaphor contributed by Trever Smith. High School is like a zoo. There are a plethora of crazy animals running around. Its chaos. The freshmen for example are like rats. They eat the upper classmen's scraps, scatter when there are any threats, no one likes them and they smell funny. (This was NEVER the case with class of '08 by the way) Cheerleaders are those birds that wake you up every god damn morning and even if you through a brick at them they don't stop. (exceptions include funky fresh, Richelle, and anyone else that would injure me-im very fragile) A plethora of teachers are like vampire bats because they suck fun and time out of you. They also fly around using ecolocation to detect phones/ipods/any source of amusment. The Kriegmeister is not included in this category. She is more of a clownfish. She can be Marlin's wife/ Nemo's mommy. Clowns are funny and provide amusment. However you have to pay them. Mrs Krieger, instead of taking currency, she generously accepts visa, master card and well written papers. She also knows how to make someones day.

But anyway, another exhibit in the zoo of UEHS: Kris

Soccer

2008-03-02T19:56:00.000-08:00

TODAY IS MY HALF BIRTHDAY WOOOOOOOOO exactly 6 months until i turn 19

Today i played 8 hours of soccer and got 2 championship shirts. That's becuase i don't lose. I am not unfortuantely too tired to write anything worthwhile. I will however leave you with this inspirational quote by the world renound Demitri Martin "'Sort of’ is such a harmless thing to say. Sort of. It’s just a filler. Sort of - it doesn’t really mean anything. But after certain things, sort of means everything. Like after ‘I love you’ or ‘You’re going to live’ or ‘It’s a boy.'"

Timothy

2008-03-01T19:02:00.000-08:00

I like listening to sons with my name in them. 3 in particular are Tim, i wish you were a girlby Of Montreal,Timothyby the Buoys, and Timothyby JET. Chances are if your sound is on you're listening to the first one right now because its #1 on my playlist. The others arent on because i dont have the motivation to put them on. Timothyby the Buoys is about 3 guys that fall in a mine shaft and two of them eat timothy. It is rather amusing. Lyrics are here.The third one is about an austronaught or pilot or something who breaks a record for distance flying maybe. But he crashes and dies. Another uplifting story. Hopefully when and if i die, it will be epic so i can have a song about how i was invaded by parascites or spontaneously combusted.

P.S. TOMORROW IS MY HALF BIRTHDAY WOOOOOO

BLAHBLAHNONSENSEBLAHBLAH

2008-02-29T20:27:00.000-08:00

2 DAYS UNTIL TIM'S HALF BIRTHDAY

Today was the hockey all star game and mark Wobewts is a little dirtbag cuz he stole my breakaway which i would have scored on trever thus giving me bragging rights for the rest of his pitiful meaningless existance. (just kidding man it's not going to be COMPLETELY pathetic) Also for those of you who missed it, i have decided to change my hair everyday until i run out of ideas or get a haircut. Degrading myself is what i do. It's also what the kriegmeister does when she takes away a score on one of my tests. (pun think about it) oh well i hate you mark

Half Birthday Countdown/Interview

2008-02-28T18:04:00.000-08:00

3 DAYS UNTIL MY GLORIOUS HALF BIRTHDAY

Interview with a person SEE IF YOU CAN GUESS WHO!!!
T-What is your name?
?- Kimberly Lauren Young
T-When is your birthday?
K- November 30th,1989
T-What is your address?
K- 666 Satan Street, Endicott, NY 13760
T-What is your social security number?
K- hahahahah! NOT TELLING
T-Come on ill show you mine if you show me yours
K-ooooohh ;-)
T- what is your place of employment
K-Ugh Roma's (slavery) Bakery
T- So youre a slave?
K- basically yes
T- what kind? cotton or sex
K-both.
T-im pretty sure thats illegal
K-oh hhmm. next question
T-you know avoiding questions doesnt make them go away
K-next question
T-ok hmm what is your favorite color
K-blue and pink
T-so are u a big fan of cotton candy?
K- eh i mean its alright but its SO sweet, plus it makes my fingers sticky
T- what is your favorite colored sock
K- black!!! i was so pumped to get some for christmas
T-i like plaid and camo combined
T- its a nice shade-like a sewing machine just puked
T- but once you go black you never go back unless your MJ
K- hahaha
T- What's another word for Thesaurus?
K-dictionary
T-im pretty sure thats not right
K- oh well SUE ME
T- maybe i will i got Johnney Cochran on speed dial
T- well until he bit the dust
K- haha whats your blog bout
T- dunno yet
K- wow
T- Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse
K- obviously
T- What is the speed of dark?
K- 0
T- why?
K- cause
T- oh ok well if you say so
T- If con is the opposite of pro, does that mean that congress is the opposite of progress?
K- no OBVIOUSLY NOT
T- YOU CANT SPEAK IN CAPS LOCK
K- WATCH ME
T- THIS IS AN ONLINE SURVEY HOW CAN I WATCH YOU?
K- ;-)
T- on a scale from 19 to infinity, how awesome is tim sagasti
K- beyond infinity (forever)
T- ok last question
K- ok
T-if you could have a super power what would it be
K- be invisible when i want
T- why
K- cause it'd be awesome
T- thats stupid try again
K-wow tim yourmaking my self esteem go down
T- well get better opinions then
K- wow
T- what is your opinion of hilary clinton
K-hahahaha billlary is annoying. and need to peace
K- billary. not just hillary
K- bill+hillary=billary DDUHHH
T-good answer
T- wanna know what i think about hilary? im assuming you do since you have nothing better to do than read obnoxiously stupid questions. i think she is a subhuman bitch and needs to get tied to a goat for 48 hours.

19 Places NOT to Have Water Fights

2008-02-27T17:20:00.000-08:00

19. Titanic
19. In the middle of the Sahara
19. Red Carpet on Oscar Night
19. Outside of a Beauty Parlor
19. Maximum Security Prison
19. Gunpowder Factory
19. A walk-in freezer
18. Cotton Candy Factory
17. The Louvre
16. Sand Castle Competition
15. At Cirque De Soleil tightrope act
14. While driving
13. At a glass blowing demonstration
12. Atlanta's Disease control center
11. In Harvard's Rare book section
10. Maternity Ward
9. Funeral Home
8. In a powerplant
7. Any bomb squad situation
6. While Performing open heart surgery
5. White House Press Conference
4. House of cards competition
3. In the Wicked Witch of the West's castle
2. Hell
1. At Lunch With Brian Shaver

Tim in the Wild Vol IV

2008-02-26T16:11:00.000-08:00

Tim is back with another epic quest to search the most aggressive one yet- Charles Hamilton. This was a hard one to capture due to it's overwhelming need to lash out against the passive and harmless (not to mention stunning) cameraman.
PART I

PART II

PART III

SOME HOT BLOG ON BLOG ACTION!!!

2008-02-25T19:16:00.000-08:00

http://www.sabresreport.com/blogs/

This was a blog about whether or not the Sabres should trade/let go Brian Campbell, their star defenseman. I think he should remain in Buffalo, mostly because he is nasty. (Also because he is in a commercial for a buffalo hospital or something) In the article the writer makes a good point about if he leaves it will be like the Oakland A's developing players into their prime before sending them off to another team. Now im not much of a basketball* fan so i dont know who they are* so i will make my own analogy. The aliens hatched tim sagasti on the mother ship and sent him to earth for the sole purpose of becoming the ultimate supremem being. The Sabres trading Brian Campbell would be like taking him back to his home planet of ___________ (they do not use the same characters as mere earthlings so it would be impossible to type the planets proper title)*** super early before accomplishing his mission.

*joke
***it can be roughly translated as tmsmzng

Cookies

2008-02-24T18:02:00.000-08:00

So today my mom made cookies. They were ok but kinda blob shaped. Cookies are supposed to be round and flat like a disk; NOT a mound like the raw meat ball in that cingular commercial. So i pose you this challenge-

WHOEVER MAKES ME THE BEST COOKIES WILL GET MY ETERNAL LOVE AND A PROMINENT ROLE IN EVERY BLOG FOREVER!

Blog

2008-02-23T21:53:00.000-08:00

Today one of my soccer teams (Ben Fica), consisting of the all star team Tim Sagasti, Tyler Pianella, Anthony Espe, Riley Battaglini, Joel Collins, AJ Luna, Stepo Voorhis, Lexi Oltmer, Kristin Enty, Jon Friend and last/least Stefan Oliverias beat some SRU team from SV. They sucks bad. I played goalie and it was boring but we won like 6-3. Woooooo go team.

Tim in the Wild Vol IV- Ramos

2008-02-22T09:12:00.000-08:00

In his forth and most daring volume yet, Tim tracks Andrew Ramos the fastest and most dangerous animal for yards around.

Pockets

2008-02-21T20:20:00.000-08:00

I was going to write about the krieg meister's suggestion the contents of my pockets. Unfortunately for most similarly to b-crane, i am not wearing any pants. So i would have to say there is nothing in my nonexistant pockets. If you would like to know what i usually have on my person, then you can read my version of "The Things We Carried" It is pretty spectacular. I cant remember what its about but due to the fact its written by me, it MUST be good. jk but seriously.
AND VESTAL LOST IN A SHOOTOUT which basically means its the GREATEST DAY EVER i've got some sweet videos of the game which i will put up eventually.

THE END

Dream Vacation

2008-02-20T23:58:00.000-08:00

This is difficult. I never go on vacation because soccer trips to virginia and maryland basically are our vacations. Gun to my head however i would say Germany. Germany is a great country. They have an amazing soccer team led by their captain, Michael Ballack. There are salt mines, the ex Berlin wall, Oktoberfest, and the Black Forest. I dont like to relax or go to beaches on vacation because i get super bored quickly.

Dream Job

2008-02-19T19:19:00.000-08:00

So i thought this quote was approprite for this blog
"There is no greater joy than soaring high on the wings of your dreams...except maybe the joy of watching a dreamer who has nowhere to land but in the ocean of reality"
Anyway after that slightly inspirational quote, i would LOVE to be paid to be Tim Sagasti. I suppose being tim sagasti would be my dream job. i have never been paid much to be myself before but i like money, i using money and i like me. I have a plethora of experience, and im good at it. Another positive aspect is that there is paid vacation. The only bad thing about this job is there is poor benefits. No health care or anything! I was disgusted at first but now im ok with it because i realized that i never stop getting paid so the retirement benefits are immense.
I really wanted to be a paleontologist or however its spelled. ILOVED dinosaurs. They were basically my life. Everything i did revolved around them. I was even a Pterodactyl for halloween one year. Any veterans from TJW may remember-it was first grade.

Minicity

2008-02-18T20:42:00.000-08:00

i was looking at aways cuz i was bored and i happened to see stefans and then i happened to see lexi's (stefan's gf) they each had a link to their own mini city. i got on to to this blog and i looked at shavers blog. ironically enough, he posted a link to stefans minicity. Since they are having a competetion, i though it would be only fair to post hers up. Following in shavers mediocre footsteps once again, i made my own. VISIT SO STEFAN LOSES AND I CAN RUB IT IN HIS FACE!!!:-) you know you want to.

South Timland

Lexi-Land

Bored

2008-02-17T22:01:00.000-08:00

Today, still being under quarentine, i decided to do something entertaining and time consuming. Since my parents were so involved in whatever it was they were doing and i was feeling particularly mischievous i employed the help of Brian to pull an epic prank. We spent maybe an hour on it but it was totally worth it.

Also, on an unrelated note, congrats to the CV hockey team for beating the freakin dirtbags on the ME hockey team. They didnt deserve to be there and i am grateful that CV put them in their place.

JC

2008-02-16T18:43:00.000-08:00

Congrats to the JC hockey team who beat vestal, whose team consists mainly of stuck up cocky pricks

Good luck to JC in the finals

Tim in the Wild Volume II

2008-02-16T16:53:00.001-08:00

Tim's second voyage to the most dangerous environments in the high school, putting his own neck on the line for the good of all his loyal fans and viewers. Tim is now happy to present..
Jenna the Savage Swed Part I

Part II

THE END

No blog

2008-02-15T19:19:00.000-08:00

I have nothing to say today. Im sorry to dissappoint all my daily viewers, worshippers or members of my cult. Im sick and cant think of anything to write. i had some ideas but they are too good and i cant do them justice in this state. so ill write about my afternoon
After i got home school, i watched a solid 6 hours off tv in the dark by myself. although this may seem depressing it kinda was but its more pathetic. i watched slapshot colbert report and part of an atlanta/new jersey hockey game. every 8-11 minutes i would have to change ends of the couch cuz the bottom nostril (laying horizontal) was full and i couldnt breathe. i HATE that oh well kbye
THE END

Marty Drum = stupid freakin idiot

2008-02-14T19:03:00.000-08:00

First let me start by saying every year especially this one refs have screwed over UE hockey. 2 years ago Championship game for example. We were tied with Vestal. They brought it down the ice and managed to score with 0.0 seconds left. Now i know matt asher can figure this out but for those not so math inclined, that means theres no time left and the game is over. Yet these reffs still managed to count the goal and lose the game for us and force us into game 2 (its double elimanation and we lost the next game)
This year was particularly bad. We got called for the most ridiculously outrageous things. Tonights game was sadly the last game our seniors will be playing in. (Tim Sagasti, Mark Roberts, Davis Stella, Trevor Buckounhslkdfjgnski, John Fifield, Anothony Cipoletti, and kinda Ryan Meyer)We lost to M-E 5-2. NOw that may sound bad but it is not really due to one empty netter, and 17 undeserved penalties. (and 2 deserving ones) We were down at least one man for nearly the entire first and second period. Yet we still beat them in shots. We are easily better than them with even numbers.
If we hadnt had all the ridiculous penalties it would have been a much more fair game and we would/should have stomped all over them then blown our noses all over the mass of incompetence that was left.
In conclusion, Marty Drum, you're a _____*. Enjoy reffing mite hockey next year.

*add word of your choice here

Robin Hood

2008-02-13T06:01:00.000-08:00

i think Robin Hood was a filthy liar, and a no-good, common thief. Sure he was trying to "help" the poor and whatnot but he was stealing from other people. He clearly had very selective morals. He used his lack-of-conscience to manipulate his morality thus enabling him to boost his reputation and wealth. Some proof of this theory is merely the fact that he was ignorant. If he had actually thought about it he could have just called on America, land of the free and home of the brave. Now one might argue, "well Tim, America land of the free and home of the brave, didnt exist back then because it takes place in the range of 1100-1300 A.D." "Ah HAH!!" Tim would so wittingly retort, "America land of the free and home of the brave, may not have existed, but the concept did!" (The country actually did too but only the Godhumans that descended into Jon Friend were there to know about it)
America has a habit of helping those who are in need. Just look at our wellfare system and unemployment opportunities. This is basically a legal version of what Robin Hood did. By taxing the rich more and giving it to people who are lazy or get screwed over, it is essentially the same.
He wanted everyone to be equal so badly that he was the very first Marxist. If he hadn't been for the noble Prioress and her lover Sir Roger of Doncaster, England could very well have become the first communisist state, which would spread and infect Wales, Ireland and shortly after that, the mainland with the red disease. I am sure that ancestors of the Prioress and Sir Roger are now living in America land of the free and home of the brave today, and doing great things.

THE END

Education

2008-02-12T12:58:00.000-08:00

I think education is overrated. Although the Kriegster is a briliant teacher, she is sadly second to my all time favorite teacher who i have known for nearly 18 1/2 years. His name is Professor Life. He taught me a plethora; everything i've ever needed to know and im pretty sure will continue to do so until he retires, and Professor Death replaces him. He doesn't teach any nonsense like integrals, antiderivatives, cursive, (i mean besides andrew ramos who writes in cursive anyway) the Keynesian view of the economy, and the velocity and Potential energy of a falling snowball immediately before it strikes the back of my victims head. Professor Life gives me metaphorical candy when im good, and figuratively poops all over me when im not so good.

THE END

Tim in the Wild- Travis

2008-02-11T19:39:00.000-08:00

This is Tim's documentary on Travis Blais.
Part I

Part II

Part III

Part IV

This is my trek documenting T-Blazer (travii blaisious)It is a very secluded, elusive creature. For this reason, it has not been captured on film until now. It feasts on grubs by tapping on trees to locate them, then gnaws holes in the wood and inserts its elongated middle finger to pull the grubs out. To find out more visit this website

Plethora

2008-02-10T07:44:00.000-08:00

pleth·o·ra /ˈplɛθərə/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[pleth-er-uh]
–noun

1.
overabundance; excess: a plethora of advice and a paucity of assistance.

2.
Pathology Archaic. a morbid condition due to excess of red corpuscles in the blood or increase in the quantity of blood.

[Origin: 1535–45; <>

PLETHORA